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Top 10 Apocalypse Flops

Buzz! — Mon, 04 Feb 2013 12:40:22 +0000

With the most recent episode in the never ending saga of apocalyptic scares behind us – the December 21, 2012 so-called ‘Mayan apocalypse’ – one is left to wonder exactly why everyone’s so hell-bent on selling hysteria.

Indeed, when you consider the seemingly endless list of apocalyptic preachers and doomsayers through the ages, “The Boy Who Cried Apocalypse” actually becomes a rather humorous tale. So let us take a step back now to look at a fraction of 1% of the finest moments in our most recent apocalyptic scares (because, yes, there really are that many).

Maestro, if you will. Please queue up your corniest montage music.

10 Halley’s Comet – 1910

Although Halley’s comet makes an appearance in the sky every 76 years, National Geographic reports that “The comet’s impending arrival in 1910…stirred apocalyptic hysteria among Europeans and Americans…many of whom believed that the comet’s tail contained a gas ‘that would impregnate the atmosphere and possibly snuff out all life on the planet,’ according the French astronomer Camille Flammarion, as quoted in the book Apocalypses.

In 2062, let us please remember not to hold our breath.

9 Margaret Rowan – February 13, 1925

Had Margaret Rowan been right, many of us alive in the 21st Century would have never seen the light of day. According to Rowan, the angel Gabriel appeared to her in a vision to reveal that the Earth would meet destruction at midnight on February 13, 1925.ii

Was it a coincidence that February 13, 1925 was a Friday or could that have played into the psychology of the ‘vision’?

8 Jeane Dixon – 1962

Theories about strange planetary alignments tearing the planet apart seem to make their way in and out of many apocalyptic musings. In a modern world, it smacks of that perfect mix of science and science fiction to give it a strange ring of “Well, maybe it could be happen.”

When astrologer Jeane Dixon predicted the Earth would be destroyed on February 4, 1962 from a freakish planetary alignment that, well, could make that happen, that logic seemed realer than ever.iii

Fortunately, this galactic game of magnetic and gravitational pinball never took place and the Earth lived to see another day.

7 Charles Manson Race War – 1969

While no one other than Charles Manson and his followers really bought into this one (thankfully), it must be part of the list to illustrate, if nothing else, the destructive power of an unrestrained doomsayer.

In 1969, under pretenses of sparking an impending near-apocalyptic race war (dubbed Helter Skelter by Manson); the “family” (Manson’s followers) committed a string of senseless murders that culminated in the brutal murder of pregnant starlet, Sharon Tate.iv

6 Nostradamus – 1999

While many of Nostradamus’s predictions did in fact come true, he clearly missed the mark in his prediction for 1999 when he wrote:

There will appear, towards the North

Not far from Cancer, a long-tailed comet

Susa, Siena, Boetia, Eretria

When the Catholic church dies, daylight will return.

Clearly Nostradamus’s cryptic prose leaves room for interpretation. Yet author Ned Halley adds in The Complete Prophecies of Nostradamus, “This is one of Nostradamus’s many foretellings of Armageddon, to be signposted by the flaming tail of a comet.”

While we cannot be sure beyond a shadow of a doubt about the true meaning of basically anything Nostradamus said, a list of apocalypses just isn’t complete without his most indelible presence.

5 Y2K (Year 2000)

Several years behind the Hale-Bopp comet and the infamous Heaven’s Gate mass suicide of 1997 (which spurred some apocalyptic hysteria of its own); Y2K became the new face of doom in the years leading into the Millennium.

In short, the debacle centered on a simple yet prickly programming oversight: To save money in programing, a two-digit abbreviation system was employed to denote the year as opposed to a four-digit system. As the problem became clear, fears mounted that computers would go haywire when faced with the year ‘00’, confusing 2000 for 1900 and a pre-computer era.vi

“With 300 million interconnected computers worldwide,” writes Brian W. Fairbanks in Surviving Y2K: Staying on Top in a World Turned Upside Down, “computers now carry the burden of Atlas, balancing the entire globe on their shoulders. But now there’s a bug resting on those powerful biceps. On January 1, 2000, that bug will start to move, crawling on those ticklish arms.”

Through a consorted effort by the powers that be and billions of dollars in research and implementation, the bug was effectively squished and the big “what if” surrounding Y2K quickly became a “remember when?” to the relief of the world.

4 Large Hadron Collider (LHC) Black Hole Scenario

When you set out to uncover the structure of space‐time and demystify the fundamental constituents of matter, you may raise a few eyebrows.vii But when word caught on about the potential for the LHC to create a ravenous black hole, well it’s no surprise that doomsayers had ruffled feathers.

Of all the fears on this list, perhaps the LHC had just enough scientific oomph to legitimize the brief stint of concern that many people felt. Fortunately, when they finally fired the LHC up in 2010, the Earth wasn’t swallowed by a black hole.viii

3 ‘Doomsday’ Comet Elenin

An unwanted visitor from the outer solar system (the Oort Cloud) came into our galactic neighborhood in late 2010, prompting some marginal hysteria and interesting headlines.ix

“Also known by its astronomical name, C/2010 X1, Elenin somehow quickly became something of a “cause célèbre” for a few Internet bloggers,” wrote NASA on October 25, 2011, “who proclaimed this minor comet could/would/should be responsible for causing any number of disasters to befall our planet.”

NASA dispelled the rumors, adding, “There are no known credible threats to date.” Certainly, the tendency of doomsayers to grasp onto the “death from above” scenario always comes into sharper focus when a NEO (near-earth object) enters the scene.

Hopefully going forward, people will leave the predictions to the scientists!

2 Harold Camping’s Rapture

Harold Camping’s highly publicized predictions for Rapture on May 21, 2011 came undone when the date came and went like any other. A real headline maker, major news outlets covered the rise and fall of the prediction.

Writes Garance Burke of the Huffington Post: “Camping, a retired civil engineer, had originally forecast that some 200 million people would be saved when the globe was destroyed, and warned that those left behind would die in earthquakes, plagues and other scourges until Earth was consumed by a fireball.”x

In the end, Camping admitted the error of his prediction as doomsayers changed their gaze to the next big date, December 21, 2012.

1 December 21, 2012

In recent years, the grossly skewed and misinterpreted “2012 Maya apocalypse” cluttered the internet and airwaves with unrelenting speculation and prediction. Yet the slightest bit of research could have easily disproven even the most outrageous of 2012 apocalypse claims.

Perhaps the first step for those touting the 2012 Mayan apocalypse should have been to reanalyze the incorrect assumption that the Mayan calendar ended in 2012. In fact, a simple read in a text book reveals that the ancient Maya believed in cyclical time and thus, a Baktun transition into a new era.

A very complicated equation can be used to describe this incredible breakthrough in logic:

Transition ≠ End of Days

With no shortage of doomsayers, just a few of the catastrophic scenarios caught in the magnetic pull of misinformation included the Niburu (aka Planet X) collision fears, massive solar storms, a shift in the magnetic poles and a rare planetary alignment that would cause colossal tidal effects. NASA swiftly put those fears to rest in a series of statements and videos (for example, eeny, meeny, miny, moe) leading up to (and following) that most auspicious of dates.

In the end, with the passage of the date, this very tired story was put to bed once and for all. For those still in disbelief, feel free to read up on “Why the World Didn’t End” on 2012, courtesy of NASA.

List written by: Marlon Heimerl. Marlon Heimerl is a writer for HalloweenCostumes.com, a leading online retailer in Halloween costumes, accessories and décor.

Top 10 Reasons you are Not Losing Weight

Buzz! — Sun, 12 Aug 2012 14:50:28 +0000

Of the tens of millions of people the world over pouring their hearts and souls into diets for weight loss and health gain, a staggering percentage find themselves asking the same question every day – “Why the **** am I still not losing any weight?”

Frustrating to say the least but regardless of the circumstances, there is always a reason why any diet may not be working – the following being the top ten reasons to consider before going entirely up the proverbial wall:

10 Your diet is not a diet

Perhaps this should be the number one reason but as it is fairly obvious to all, a number 10 spot seemed more appropriate. Perhaps the biggest reason for all diets failing is the fact that they are not diets at all – i.e. those thinking they are making healthy eating choices are in fact doing the mirror opposite. There are dozens of foods and drinks that appear to be excellent choices for dieters, though in fact pack more of a calorie wallop than bears thinking about. From certain fruits to smoothies to pasta to cereals to nuts and countless others, so many diets never even get off the ground for the simple reason that they are not diets at all.

9 You’re neglecting Sleep

Keeping active and avoiding laziness of course contributes hugely to weight loss, but on the other hand there is nothing more detrimental than overdoing it and neglecting sleep. The human body simply cannot do ANYTHING at all to its maximum potential without a regular and steady sleep pattern – which includes losing weight. A tired and worn out body will not only have trouble processing calories, but will instinctively begin to store extra fat reserves to cope with the demand of the exhausting lifestyle.

8 You’re actually bulking up

The term ‘losing weight’ gets thrown around a little too easily when it comes to dieting, as some find themselves ending up with the body of their dreams without every losing a single pound. The reason for this is the simple fact that muscle weighs far more than fat, therefore if a diet and exercise routing is successfully burning fat reserves at the same time as building muscle, the overall weight of the body may not go down at all.

It is for this reason that obsessing exclusively over the bathroom scales is a little on the unwise side when looking to shed excess body fat.

7 You’re putting too much pressure on yourself

There is a marked difference between idealistic goals and realistic goals when it comes to losing weight, with the latter of the two often being the most neglected. Of course, an overnight transformation is exactly what most would opt for given the chance, but as this is impossible in quite literally 100% of examples of sensible diets, losing hope in the short term is really a redundant attitude.

So many diets fail simply because people insist on putting far too much pressure on themselves and set goals they cannot and will not reach.

6 You aren’t eating enough

If cutting down on fat and calories to a modest extent can help weight loss then surely cutting down on them to a massive extent would be even better, right? Unfortunately not, as one of the main reasons millions every day face the reality of not losing any weight is because they are in fact not eating enough. When the body is deprived of much needed fuel, it instinctively goes into something of a ‘starvation’ mode where existing fat reserves are held onto as long as possible and all new calories and fat introduced are stored. Indeed, under-eating often has the potential to be more dangerous than overeating.

5 You’re not keeping realistic track

You may think that your each and every move has been tailored and carried out with nothing other than the most angelic eating and exercise plan imaginable in mind, but has it really? Something of an ‘a little bit here, a little bit there’ approach to treats and indulgences may make a dieter think they are making huge cutbacks for the sake of their goals, but it is almost impossible to keep realistic track without vested efforts. If your life is particularly busy or active, try keeping a comprehensive diary for a week of everything eaten and all exercise…and prepare for a big surprise.

4 You’re surrounded by too many temptations

No real-world person has the iron-clad willpower required to resist all temptations when faced with them 24/7, therefore the only way of ruling them out of the equation is to get rid of them altogether. Secret reserves of treats and unhealthy food put away for a rainy day will inevitably come out long before said rainy day ever arrives, therefore lose the temptation and lose the chance of blowing your efforts on a one-night binge.

3 Your exercise regime is garbage

If you have created an exercise regime all by yourself and you do not have any background in health and fitness on a professional level, odds are your routine is fundamentally flawed – perhaps even entirely ineffective. It is simply impossible to benefit from the most sublimely effective exercise plan without some degree of professional advice or involvement – much better than working yourself into an early grave.

2 You’re lying to yourself

“But I am eating healthy, cutting out all treats and exercising my butt off…how can I not be losing weight?!” A question asked millions of times every day with that in most cases deserves as question in return…that being are you really? Cutting back on a couple of indulgences and taking a brisk walk twice a week is certainly an improvement over nothing at all, but will bring little by way of tangible results to say the least. Nevertheless, people the world over convince themselves that these mild to moderate changes will have them looking like a true wonder to behold practically overnight, which is of course quite depressingly impossible.

1 You’re in need of medical assistance

Of course, if all else fails and you really have tried every trick in the book – including a painful level of honesty – the time may have come to seek genuine medical advice. There are thousands of medical reasons why a person may not be able to lose weight or indeed may require a unique approach, but before making a beeline for the doctor’s office in search of a miracle cure, be advised that the above points account for at least 99.9% of all problematic weight-loss regimes.

Top 10 Death Row Requests

Buzz! — Fri, 10 Aug 2012 13:43:44 +0000

We’ve all asked or at least thought about the situation whereby we could only eat one more food for the rest of our lives, or perhaps what we would request if we could have anything in the world as our last meal…period. Macabre a thought as it may, be there are hundreds of people the world over at any one time who for various reasons are indeed faced with exactly such a decision, which of course results in some of the most weird and wonderful requests imaginable.

So, exactly what do those quite literally at the end of their rope crave at the very last moment, before facing the mother of all known diets?

10 Robert Buell

Robert Buell became famous in the early 80s for all the wrong reasons, having been convicted of the rape murder of a child of 11. Despite the fact that he had already been sentenced to serve no less than 121 years for a string of other rape offence, he continued to adamantly deny his involvement in this particular murder.

For his last meal on God’s green Earth, Buell request just a single black olive…though was at least demanding enough to insist that the stone was removed.

9 Odell Barnes Junior

Prison catering staff and the outside sources used for special requests are used to fulfilling baffling orders, but that coming from Odell Barnes Junior was a little out of even their league. Despite the fact that back in 1989 he had beaten, burgled and murdered a woman in the most brutal possible manner, he decided that his last wish would be world peace with a lavish side of equality and justice.

He was of course denied and therefore got the standard issue rations.

8 Saddam Hussein

A brief mention now to this particular request just for the sake of its rather high profile nature, Saddam Hussein reportedly turned down a final request of cigarettes and chicken, opting for mainly boiled rice in the days leading up to his hanging.

7 Robert Madden

A particularly famous case was that of Robert Madden, who despite being convicted of murder most horrid requested his last meal to be donated to a homeless person of the choice of the prison staff. However, what made the story more surprising was the fact that his request was turned down point blank for no good reason.

A sad story with no winners, though the tale did go on to motivate others to do the same across the US, though with much more accommodating prison staff.

6 Walter LaGrand

Another notably large meal though with one classic touch of common sense came from Walter LaGrand who said his final goodbye back in 1999, following his conviction of a shopping list of hideous crimes. He request a meal consisting of 16 pieces of bacon, pile of hash browns, six eggs, breakfast steaks, sherbet, three different sodas, coffee, two packs of sugar and hot sauce.

The crowning glory…a pack of Rolaids to limit suffering…there would be enough of that to come.

5 James Edward Smith

Convicted of robbery and horrific murder in the Texas capital of Houston, James Edward Smith departed from this world at the hands of prison officials back in 1990.

Smith became further famous the world over after requesting nothing other than a lump of dirt as his final ‘meal’ request, which was supposedly something he needed for a voodoo ritual he was planning to conduct.

Sadly for him, dirt did not appear on the approved list of meals items on this particular prison’ list, therefore he had to make do with yogurt.

4 Delbert Teague Junior

1998 saw a death-row inmate in Texas exit the world much in a similar vein to that in which he entered it – that being entirely at the beckon call of his dear old mother. 35 year old Teague had initially turned down his last meal as he had planned to eat nothing and shun the request all along.

His resolve didn’t last however and he subsequently ended up eating a cheeseburger – because his mum said he had to.

3 Jeffrey Dillingham

An entry now just to pay homage to all the biggest last meal request in the world, or at least those who have actually managed to trough their way through theirs. In the case of Jeffrey Dillingham of Texas, he decided the his last one would be a big one, ordering up a triple cheeseburger with no mayo (maybe he was watching the calories), a huge portion of fries, lasagna, garlic bread, macaroni cheese, three cinnamon rolls, a half-pound of nacho cheese five eggs and to wash it all down with…eight (yes 8) pints of milkshake.

2 Thomas Grasso

Another last meal request to quickly become famous the world over, Thomas Grasso was like many others in insisting he would do his best to let cholesterol take him first. His mammoth meal which he actually managed to plough through consisted of a double Burger King cheeseburger with the works, a specific brand can of spaghetti and meatballs, 24 cooked mussels, half a pie, a mango, whipped cream and a giant milkshake.

Unfortunately, he did not part this mortal coil pleased, after condemning the prison in the strongest possible terms for providing him with canned spaghetti, when he actually requested Spaghetti-Os.

“I did not get my Spaghetti-O’s. I got spaghetti. I want the press to know this!” became part of his world-famous last speech.

1 Lawrence Russell Brewer

And finally, taking the number one spot is a death-row inmate who will forever be remembered as one who managed to take the only treat those to follow in his footsteps may have looked forward to away once and for all… Lawrence Russell Brewer.

Brewer ordered a decidedly luxurious feast of chicken fried steaks with onions and gravy, a triple cheeseburger with all the trimmings on the side, a large meat and vegetable omelet, fried okra with plenty of ketchup, half a loaf of bread, a whole pound of barbecue meat, a meat feast pizza, three fully loaded fajitas, three cans of soda, peanut butter fudge and a pint of ice cream.

Incredibly, the whole meal was brought to Brewer, which he then refused to take a single bite of.

This inspired the state of Texas to eliminate last meal requests as of September 2011, though really who can be blamed here…the maniac with a penchant for erratic behavior, or the prison and catering staff that really should know better?

Debatable to say the least, but thus ends a long-standing tradition and final privilege for a new generation of death-row inmates…at least in Texas anyway!

Top 10 Amusing Phobias for All Other than the Poor Sufferers

Buzz! — Wed, 08 Aug 2012 12:55:38 +0000

Each and every last one of us will have something somewhere in the world that we hold with a sense of abject dread and simply cannot bear the thought of – at least to a modest extent. However, those with true medically diagnosed phobias have something of a much more difficult lot and have to deal with the kind of true, blood-curdling and life-changing fear the rest of us simply cannot imagine.

Spiders, dentist, flying and other such common example are all but taken for granted and accepted, but what about the poor souls living with altogether more rare and misunderstood phobias?

10 Ablutophobia

Ablutophobia is the official title given to the all-consuming and truly devastating fear of anything to do with bathing, cleaning or washing in general. This applies not only to the person in question but also the surrounding areas and can therefore result in rather severe medical conditions and the potential for living in abject squalor. As is the case with most phobias, there is very little explanation as to when or why an onset of Ablutophiba may occur, though thankfully lists as one of the rarest – at least the more extreme cases.

9 Ergophobia

Prepare your accusations and cries of laziness if you will, but the fact of the matter is that there is indeed an officially recognized fear of work, which is Ergophobia. In fact, Ergophobia stretches far further than work alone and can in fact be the abject fear of functioning altogether, leaving those suffering from the condition unable to do anything productive without suffering horrendously in the process.

And before you’re tempted…no…this will not win you a free week off work if used surreptitiously.

8 Tetraphobia

Moving now well and truly closer to the ranks of the weird and wonderful, Tetraphobia is the irrational and altogether barrier-building fear of the number 4. Needless to say, those suffering from this particular condition will likely face at least one birthday every ten year that will not be to their liking, with a certain date in their fifth decade bringing about 12-months in their own personal hell.

You just try avoiding the number 4 for a whole day and see how much fun it isn’t!

7 Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia

My personal favorite now and in no way for reasons of unkindness, those behind the naming of Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia really must have been playing a joke on the world. I mean seriously, could there be any worse title for a psychological and truly damaging fear of long words?

After all, it one thing to have your life blighted by a phobia, but another if you can’t bare to say, read or write its name!

Whoever is responsible for this one, shame on you…

6 Oikophobia

Credit: RebekahSfD @ flickr.com

Another example now often quoted by those who are a little concerned of their domestic role becoming permanent or are perhaps just a little bored, Oikophobia is the name given to an irrational fear of the surroundings of the home as a whole, or in some more specific cases the household appliances. Needless to say, settling down with such a person in a domestic capacity can prove rather difficult, unless of course you have a penchant for living with no mod-cons at all, or perhaps in a tent.

5 Phobophobia

Credit: Brand X Pictures @ Thinkstock

This particular example is enough to really scramble anyone’s head if given enough thought, as Phobophobia is…yes you guessed it right…the fear of having a phobia. The irrational fear of having an irrational fear is an irrational fear in its own right…therefore those who have an irrational fear of having an irrational fear will be having their irrational fear realized on a daily basis! Confused? Think how those poor people feel!!

4 Xanthophobia

There is a marked difference between having your own heated opinions on tastes and styles and truly fearing those not to your liking, as illustrated by Xanthophobia – the fear of the color yellow. This is another example of a phobia that appears to be rather amusing and less than colossally serious, though when considering just how much yellow there is in the world, facing your fears becomes a daily inevitability.

Again, just try a day without encountering yellow…welcome to the world of the Xanthophobe!

3 Trichophobia

Trichophobia refers to an uncontrollable fear or perhaps abject and insatiable disgust of loose and shed hairs, both in the case of the sufferer and each and every other person/animal around. Suffice to say that such house-holds are not what could be called pet-friendly by any stretch of the imagination, but banning all furry-friends represents the very tip of a much more complex iceberg. Imagine the thought of vomiting at the sight of a hairbrush, wanting to cry when standing close to a person with a hair on their collar or losing sleep for days at the sight of a hair in food….

Not a fun way of life by any stretch of the imagination.

2 Turophobia

While most of us the world over will like nothing more than stuffing our faces with the calorific and cholesterol-unfriendly treat in all its glory, others can think of nothing worse. In fact, some are so incredibly consumed by the very notion of cheese and all things cheesy that they are in fact classed as Turophobic – the official moniker for an irrational fear of cheese. So, the question of severity is in this case debatable, as it is of course not entirely unthinkable to go a day, week or even a lifetime without coming face-to-face with a steaming plate of Brie.

On the other hand, when thinking how much these poor people will be missing out on in their culinary escapades, they surely must be worth a little consideration at least.

1 Nomophobia

Finally, perhaps most unbelievably of all and a true product of the 21st century if ever there was one, Nomophobia is the official title handed to those who cannot bare the thought of being out of reach/contact by way of mobile phone.

A recent study carried out by a top UK research firm concluded that well over 50% of all mobile users today feel somewhat anxious and entirely uncomfortable when for one reason or another they cannot use their mobile phone. Whether through loss, battery issues, depleted credit or anything else of a similar nature, some are so massively and irrationally panic stricken that they have indeed been branded as officially Nomophobic.

Arguments as to the nature and severity of the condition are of course welcome, but there is little denying that of all in the archives today, this has to be the most disappointing and frankly embarrassing for the western world as a whole to say the least.

Top 10 Unusual International Birthday Gestures

Buzz! — Sun, 05 Aug 2012 10:29:47 +0000

It is of course only human nature to believed that our culture and heritage hit the nails right on the head when it comes to special occasions and birthday rituals, but for those willing to look a little further afield, there is a whole world of interesting and amusing practices going on that hold just as much significance to millions.

Indeed, given the fact that most of us are always striving for a way of making the next birthday to come devoid of all clichés and outright boredom, which not consider giving another idea a go from this top ten list of some of the more unusual though rather delightful birthday rituals from around the world?

10 The U.S.A

Starting off with the veritable cultural melting-pot that is the good-old US-of-A, parents in their millions are being swept by a new and undeniably fun craze known as the giving of ‘smash-cakes’. Essentially a spin-off from the classic birthday cake ide, this is something that sees additional cakes being baked in order for toddlers and children to simply destroy the cake and make as much mess as their heart desires.

Created for children – just as much fun for adults…maybe ever more so.

9 United Kingdom

Over in the UK, or more specifically Ireland and England, kids of all ages are given the “bumps” as an annual birthday ritual, as has been practiced for generations. Thankfully this is not a grim medical condition as the name may suggest, but is instead the process of picking up the lucky birthday person by their arms and legs, so as to be bumped on the floor for each year of their age. The reverence of this particular practice rather diminishes with age, for obvious reasons.

8 Caribbean

source: telegraph.co.uk

In some Caribbean regions though most notably in Jamaica, a person can expect to have his or her special day celebrated by having copious amounts of flour thrown at them from friends, family and occasionally random onlookers alike. What’s more, the really lucky ones will be systematically soaked to the skin first, just to make sure the flour sticks and is a thousand times more difficult to remove!

7 Hungary

Pulling on the earlobes is a common tradition around the world and is used to wish good luck and a happy life, much in the same way as the aforementioned British bumps. However, the practice is particularly delightful in Hungary, where following the opening of the presents, all in attendance tug on the earlobes of the lucky birthday boy or girls, while singing a song translating as “God bless you, live so long so your ears reach your ankles”.

6 Germany

In certain German regions, there is a long-standing tradition where single men upon turning 30 are required to go out and sweep the front steps of the town hall, or a local church – supposedly to show-off how good they are at keeping a house clean and tidy…and who could resist that? The tradition also dictates that they are not allowed to leave until kissed by a lady, albeit in most cases for reasons of pity.

5 Scotland

credit: jamesgrayking @ Flickr

Scotland’s take on the “bumps” now which in typical Scottish style do not beat around the bush and are administered by a straight-up though casually soft smack to the backside. The one bonus for Scottish birthday folk comes by way of a pound note to accompany each smack for every year being celebrated – plus on more for luck.

4 China

A little known fact about China is the way in which children do not receive their official names until what is known as the Mun Yuet celebration (translates as Full Moon), which takes place a month after their birth. This ritual sees the baby become bound to the world by way of a symbolic item of jewelry, such as bracelets or a tiny padlock.

It is kind of a baby shower, but celebrated one month later.

3 Canada

A long-standing tradition in Canada is the practice of birthday nose-greasing, which as the name suggests is nothing more complicated than a coordinated attack on the birthday boy or girl, whereby they are pinned to the ground and their nose smeared with butter or other greasy stuff. Apparently, the reason for the buttering is so as to make the person in question far too slippery for bad luck or negativity to get hold of in the coming year – though given how much fun it is you really don’t need much of an explanation or justification.

2 Venezuela

A tradition now that seems to have caught on around the world like wildfire without us having ever thought about it, more often than not a Venezuelan celebrating their birthday will fully expect to have their face plunged into the cake when blowing out the candles. As is the same with most other examples across the world the gesture is supposed to be one of love, laughter and luck for the year ahead.

Needless to say, there is at least a degree of skill involved in ensuring the candles have indeed been properly blown out before making the ‘gesture’, so as to avoid the mirror opposite of love and laughter.

1 Switzerland

And last but not least, my personal favorite for truly macabre reason has to be a practice common in Switzerland, or more specifically Lucerne. Like something from a straight-to-DVD though arguable disturbing horror flick, parents here will sometimes hire a clown…and an evil clown at that…who will menacingly follow and generally torment that special someone, before eventually concluding with a pie to the face.

Of course, the gesture is again only one of good luck, health and happiness for the birthday boy or girl, but I personally cannot think of anything more terrifying or sinister!

Try this one out at your own discretion, but it may be advisable to gauge exactly how strong the resolve of the ‘recipient’ is ahead of time, in order to avoid a birthday both you and they will never forget for all the wrong reasons.

Top 10 Competitive Eating Achievements NOT to be tried at home

Buzz! — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 10:00:53 +0000

Often find that your eyes are bigger than your belly? Most of us of course do, but for some brave and rather questionable souls across the world today, overeating is not something to be avoided, but instead to be celebrated and indeed rewarded.

So, we’ve all heard of the local hot dog eating contest set up by amateur groups looking for a little light entertainment at the weekend, but for those looking for something a little more impressive/stomach-turning, this selection of the top 10 professional eating achievements might serve as food for thought…pun definitely intended:

10 Cheese

More of an addition or an ingredient to most of us than a foodstuff to chow down on in its own right, cheese has nonetheless found its way into the ranks of competitive eating alongside the more conventional staples – albeit in sandwich form. As of now, the world record for grilled cheese sandwich eating is held by a Mr. Joey Chestnut, who in 10 minutes somehow managed to down no less than 47.

And yes, there really is a world record for everything these days.

9 Butter

Yes, butter. Not butter used in an item to be eaten, but plain and simple butter. Even the very best friends and closest family of Don Lerman would likely have looked at him differently for the rest of his life, albeit a perhaps modestly shortened life, after he chomped down one and three-quarter pounds of pure butter in less than five minutes.

And yes, the answer still on everyone’s lips today is…why?

For massive kudos and cholesterol all in one day?

8 Donuts

Moving now on to something most of us would likely be happy to eat in reasonably large quantities, donuts. Of course, we’d also likely be limited to how many we could get down out necks in eight minutes…maybe two or three if feeling really greedy? Well, heavyweight competitive eater Eric Booker went considerably more than one better, by swallowing up 49 in a record that has now stood for almost a decade.

I certainly will not be the one to attempt to break it, and neither should you be.

7 Spam

A guilty pleasure of mine but nothing other than canned hell to much of the world, Spam is often seen as something that would be eaten with apprehension even in small quantities…so why on Earth would anyone want to quaff the stuff on a titanic scale?

No answer to that particular question but this is exactly what Dick LeFevre did, munching down on six whole pounds of the chopped meat treat directly from the tin in 12 minutes.

His bragging rights are often the subject of debate.

6 Chili

An old favorite that was once again brought back to the big-leagues of professional gluttony, the World Chili Eating Championship is now held each year in Washington DC on Columbus Day…and what better way to celebrate such a momentous occasion?

This year’s winner was a name already featured on a list by way of Mr. Joey Chestnut himself, who along with destroying grilled cheese sandwiches at record pace is also able to gobble down chili to the tune of no less than two gallons in six minutes.

His reward? $1,250 in cash, which should just about cover the antacid bill.

5 Burgers

Takeru Kobayashi may not be a name that easily rolls off the tongues of most, though is synonymous with legendary achievements in the world of competitive eating. Not only did this particular chap hold the world hot dog eating record for no less than six years, but he also managed to set a new record by polishing off 93 (yes 93!) hamburgers in eight minutes at the 2009 Krystal Square Off.

Speechless…

4 Mayonnaise (?)

Again, this particular record has to be met with the very same ‘Why?’ factor as the earlier butter listing, as indeed, when on Earth would anyone choose to push themselves in the world of competitive mayonnaise consumption? Well, whatever the reason it does indeed happen, with the title currently being held by Oleg Zhornitskiy who for reasons that remain unknown was able to stomach over 120 ounces in under eight minutes.

3 Pizza

Yes we’ve all thought from time to time that we could demolish the world’s biggest pizza and yes eating pizza on a professional level sounds fun on the surface, but there’s also one to take the whole thing to a truly ridiculous level…that being none other than our favorite Mr. Joey Chestnut again. So, how much pizza is too much pizza? Try 29 slices of the stuff in 10 minutes.

Oh, and just in case you were wondering, well over 10,000 calories in 10 minutes…

2 Pie

Pie, getting back to the eating contests we all know and love, there has long been a love affair with the traditional pie eating contest where it is more about speed and technique than plain and simple capacity. Of all places, the World Pie Eating Championship is now held each year in a rather modest bar in Wigan, England, where the usual hands-tied-behind-the-back requires a ‘skilled’ technique to devour the humble 5-inch wide, 1.5 inch deep pie – which recently has had a vegetarian option introduced.

The current record stands with one Mr. Neil Collier, who polished off his plate sans-hands in just over 23 seconds.

The 2007 competition was almost called off after a dog named Charlie decided to help himself to 20 pies while attacking 10 more in the course of the night prior to the event.

1 Hot Dogs

And finally, our number one had to be the old-faithful hot dog eating contest, which is just as popular and indeed silly today as it has been for generations. Testing gastric mettle with these lovely cylindrical sticks of ‘meat’ has for some reason captured our attention, with the best of the best heading for Coney Island on July 4th to showcase their skills to the world.

Again, what an incredible way to celebrate a nation’s freedom…(?)

So, with such an incredible worldwide spectacle and the potential for fame and notoriety the likes of which no other foodstuff in epic quantities can bring, guess who this year once again took the record for hot dog eating? Yep, Mr. Joey Chestnut once again, who further sealed his fame and reputation by taking just ten minutes to destroy 62 hot dogs and buns.

And once again, for anyone curious about the details, over 18,000 calories in 10 minutes in this occasion…which is nothing a 160 mile run shouldn’t take care of!

Top 10 Hangover Cures that Might Actually Work

Buzz! — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 16:24:02 +0000

There will always be thousands of rather smug and downright irritating individuals out there who seem for one reason or another to be impervious to alcohol, but for the rest of us, the hangover is the immense pain that will always follow alcohol-related pleasure. Let’s face it, if we woke up in any regular morning and had the same symptoms as a biblical hangover, we’d most likely call for immediate emergency medical attention, right?

Hangovers can be about as unpleasant as any affliction most of us will endure on a regular basis, therefore in light of a million and one tired, cliché and downright ineffective cures on the web today, here is a top ten that might just work… for some… maybe…

10 Fight Fire with Fire

Thousands of examples of ‘tried and tested’ hangover cures today involve the principle of fighting fire with fire, both in an external capacity. In many parts of Eastern Europe and of course across the Far East, consuming the spiciest soups and stews possible is sworn by as the perfect way of sweating out toxins from the inside. In a similar vein, Russians flock to skin-searing saunas to produce the same effect – in some instances being held at a rather difficult to endure 190°F.

9 Not Pickled Enough?

Cultures the world over have long believed that the perfect way of putting your pickled constitution back on track is to introduce a world of pickled goodies into the mix. Explanations abound but the key is said to lie in the way in w

hich pickled products encourage water drinking and provide electrolytes – both of which are essential for curing a hangover. From chomping pickled herring to guzzling down the pickle juice itself, those with a strong enough stomach could find their answer here.

8 Calorie Bomb

Everyone has their own perfect hangover meal or snack to help put things back on track, whether it happens to be a fried breakfast, massive greasy burger or the rest of the kebab/pizza from last night. However, what all examples have in common is a massive dose of fat, salt, sugar and calories – all of which a hung-over body is craving. As such there are no right or wrongs and it is instead a matter of personal tastes – the ancient Romans having been known to favor deep-fried canary.

Disgusting you say? No more so that the thousands of tons of MSG-rich fried poultry we quaff every day!

7 Sex

Yes, ‘any excuse’ will no doubt be the cry of millions, but the simple fact of the matter is that sex can be an excellent way of starting off the morning after just right – or maybe making the afternoon a little more bearable. The reason for this is nothing more complicated than the way in which sex is excellent exercise without even feeling like exercise, therefore serves as the perfect alternative to the hangover-job nobody ever actually goes through with.

6 Feeling like S***?

Please read carefully through all available information and side effects before considering trying this one out at home, but according to countless records and indeed the accounts of thousands today, cowboys used to remedy their over-indulgence with the whiskey by making tea with rabbit droppings. Needless to say, no real medical explanation here but the practice was so common it was in fact included in a scene from Brokeback Mountain – though never made it to the final cut.

5 Duck Embryo

In the spirit of “Each to his own” and all things open-minded, it seemed unfair to exclude the questionable hangover treat that is the Filipino duck embryo. Of course, nothing could be better for building strength than a calorie-rich dose of protein, but if the sight of an undercooked fried egg is lightly to see you reaching for the bucket, maybe best to avoid the half-formed dead chick-in-a-shell that is the ‘balut’ some in tropical climbs absolutely swear by.

4 Shock to the System

In the exact opposite vain to entry 10 on our list, millions find nothing more satisfying and indeed beneficial than braving cold temperatures until seconds before frostbite becomes and inevitability. This could be a cold shower, plunge into an icy pool or, as the good-old Irish used to do, burial in cold wet river sand. The theory basically goes along the lines that the cold and re-warmth ensures the body puts up a stronger fight and beats off those alco-bugs.

3 Quit Moaning

Easier said than done but arguably the best and most healthy cure in the world, quite moaning and belly-aching about your hangover, get out of bed and do something useful! Nothing spiritual or moral here, just the plain and simple fact that a hangover wallowed in will take twice as long to clear as a hangover battled through. Literally anything will do, just as long as you aren’t in bed acting like you’re the first person in the world to feel like the proverbial bear in this instance did not ‘go’ in the proverbial woods.

2 Hair of the Dog

A true British classic if ever there was one though not entirely without its following in other far corners of the world, millions every day swear by getting right back on the wagon by indulging in the fabled hair of the dog that bit them. From Bloody Maries to pints of ale to elaborate cocktails with anything and everything imaginable in, there is of course little doubt that further alcohol will make you feel better, at least in the interim.

On the other hand, from a purely medical point of view, indulging in further booze is not to cure the hangover, but instead to prolong it – albeit in a rather fuzzy head where you won’t mind too much.

In short therefore, not a cure in any way shape or form, but might take your mind off things for a few hours.

1 Preventative Medicine

And finally, admittedly a little less on the exciting side, prevention is of course far better than cure. That being said, never one to judge drinking habits or indeed advise you to stay on the sotf drinks all night…which of course you won’t…consider some of the hangover cures before indulging, rather than when they may prove too little too late.

Indulgent meals, plenty of exercise, a good sauna to sweat out the toxins and may even a chicken embryo could work wonders the next day…but in any case won’t see you feeling any worse at least.

Top 10 “What Were They Thinking?” Place Names

Buzz! — Tue, 31 Jul 2012 17:33:57 +0000

From time to time we will all pass a place or perhaps encounter a road with a name so wonderfully silly that we just have to stop and have our picture take next to it – we really are all guilty of this innocent pleasure from time to time.

True, what’s rude and frankly hilarious in one language and culture could not be moribund in another, but this doesn’t mean that simple and rather dull logic should prevent us from celebrating our world heritage in all its delightfully childish glory!

10 Wetwang UK

A small and quite painfully picturesque hamlet found in the UK, the 670-ish residents of Wetwang (sometimes called Wetwangers) are fiercely proud of both their village and its often smirked-over name. The village has existed for centuries and was around way before the latter syllable of the name was first used as a description for a certain extremity of the male, though feel free not to let this brief history lesson in any way dilute the inescapably amusing modern connotation.

9 Hell

Say what you want about your own town and cast your own aspersions on those of others, but if there was ever a true Hell on Earth, it is to be found in Michigan. Quite literally in fact, with the historic town of Hell, which can be found just a stones-throw away from Ann Arbour. There are countless theories of how the name first came to be with most stating that poorly translated foreign language is the answer. On the other hand, others claim the town’s founder was ridiculously uninterested in the name, telling the residents saying they could name it Hell as far as he was concerned.

8 Tittybong

Seriously? Yes, very seriously indeed and the charming town of Tittybong can be found in Australia, albeit somewhat in the middle of nowhere – in traditional Australian style. Sadly, there aren’t a great many residents to proudly boast the name of their town to the rest of the world, with few over 10,000 people in total populating this quaint little slice of the Outback.

7 Accident

The kind of place you stumble across without meaning to, or maybe somewhere you better have decent insurance before visiting? Or perhaps even a town that should never have come to be, were it not for the drunken backseat romp of two larger towns? Feel free to ponder on it to your heart’s content, but the Maryland town of Accident plays host to few more than 350 residents, who according to certain sources are rather proud to be known as ‘Accidentals’.

6 Butt Hole Road

Having grown up just yards from this particular street in all its glory I can personally verify its authenticity. A childhood favorite and of truly legendary status across the schools of South Yorkshire, Butt Hole Road was a street to be found in Conisbrough in the north of England. Visitors from all four corners of the world used to slam on the brakes for a picture by the once proud roadside, though sadly in typical ‘British’ style, the street has been reborn as Archers Way to prevent embarrassment.

Give me a break….

5 Middelfart

Over to Denmark now and the centrally located town of Middelfart never fails to create quite the giggle, with road-trippers often going well and truly out of their way to pose with the sign – often for the benefit of the kids of course. Not that the Middelfart region isn’t worth a visit in its own right, with some charming historical attractions and an equally charming 14,000 or so residents.

4 Sandy Balls

Back in England now and to an example that has retained its name unless the ‘embarrassment’ of Conisbrough, the hugely popular and historical holiday center of Sandy Balls can be found in Hampshire, owing its name to the time of Henry VIII.

Perhaps the history of the name is the reason for its continuation…not that I remain bitter about the South Yorkshire example of course.

3 Twatt

Twatt is the name of a small, remote village found in Scotland, more specifically the Shetland Islands. The actual name itself derives from a historical Norse term which translates as ‘small parcel of land’; which it has to be said is a thousand times more charming than its current meaning when used in slang English terms.

Indeed, the settlement of Twatt is listed as the fourth rudest name to be found anywhere in Britain – the remaining three you will have find elsewhere as they are rather to near the bone to list here.

And for your information, there is also another Twatt in Orkney…

2 Whip-Ma-Whop-Ma-Gate

The entries are indeed coming thick and fast from the UK, with our number-2 being the considerably less rude though entirely more bizarre Whip-Ma-Whop-Ma-Gate – which is the smallest street in the city of York and is perhaps one of the most charming too.

Not that its merit matters here of course as all we are interested in is the ridiculous name, which according to an official translation provided on the road itself states that the handle originates from “Whitnourwhatnourgate” which in turn translates as “What a street”.

Others contest this however and adamantly state the correct translation is closer to “Neither one thing nor the other”.

1 Taumata whakatangihanga koauau o Tamatea turi pukaka piki maunga horo nuku pokai whenua ki tana tahu

If you have even made an attempt to read our final entry correctly than Kudos to you, as for all those who suspected that the charming town of Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch in Wales carried an impressive and frankly terrifying mouthful of a name, tremble at the might of Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu.

This modest hill of 305 meters with a less-than-modest moniker can be found in Southern New Zealand and takes the title of longest name using the English alphabet today.

Needless to say, the name is usually abbreviated to Taumata, even by those living in the locality.

For those looking for meaning, the term is said to translate as “The summit where Tamatea, the man with the big knees, the climber of mountains, the land-swallower who travelled about, played his nose flute to his loved one.”

Unimpressed? Well, there is always the alternative 105 letter name for the same place of Taumata-whakatangihanga-koauau-o-Tamatea-haumai-tawhiti-ure-haea-turi-pukaka-piki-maunga-horo-nuku-pokai-whenua-ki-tana-tahu, which in this instances translates as “The hill of the flute playing by Tamatea — who was blown hither from afar, had a slit penis, grazed his knees climbing mountains, fell on the earth, and encircled the land — to his beloved”.

Just rolls of the tongue beautifully, doesn’t it?

Top 10 Bizarre Triumph Bras

Buzz! — Mon, 30 Jul 2012 16:14:40 +0000

Few will argue with the fact that bras are cool given their actual purpose. Especially men! But, could bras get any cooler? Well, some creative folks over at Triumph seem to believe so. Triumph International is a widely known (operates in 120 countries around the world) underwear manufacturer that was founded in Germany back at 1886. Apart from regular bras, they also come up with some really bizarre ideas which aren’t exactly the type of lingerie an ordinary woman has in her drawer.

It is kind of a tradition for the company to bring to life those bizarre ideas once or twice every year. They say their bras reflect social trends and as you’re about to find out, they do have a point. Of course, all but one of following lingerie were meant as a PR stunt; clearly not for sale. Unless you’re Lady Gaga…

10 Support Japan Bra

This odd lingerie set was created for the two month anniversary of the 11 March, 2001 quake and tsunami that caused severe damage in Japan. It is a two piece set that delivers encouraging, sympathy messages from 54 company employees in 36 countries. The messages are shown in the employees’ native languages (they were not translated to Japanese) and they are accompanied with the flag of the nation of origin. China, Indonesia ,Greece, Russia, Germany, France, Switzerland to name a few. A message from China reads “Those who have already left us let us know life is so fragile, and those who are alive let us know life is so strong.” The company model in the picture is the 20 year old Hikaru Kawai from the hard-hit Sendai . At the release event, she said “I hope to help lift the spirits of people in the devastated areas”.

9 Quit Smoking Bra

A good number of companies have launched campaigns based on the “quit smoking” theme, but this is probably the most weird of all. This isn’t just a themed bra though. According to Triumph, the bra releases scents of lavender and jasmine. The former has soothing properties and the latter, creates a rather unpleasant flavor when combined with cigarette smoke, helping the female smoker to quit the nasty habit…

8 Jury System Bra

This gold bikini, named “ Jury System Bra” was inspired by the image of Lady justice. Yes, Princess Leia has probably nothing to do with it! It was released in Tokyo on November 6, 2008 in order to raise public awareness about the new jury system that started on May 21, 2009.

The campaign girl in the photos is the 19 year old, Hiromi Nishiuchi.

7 Welcome To Japan!

A tour bra that talks and promotes sightseeing! I don’t know about you but I can’t think of a better welcome to Japan. Or any other country for that matter! The tour guide bra was presented in Tokyo on November 10th, 2010 to celebrate the increase in tourism the country was experiencing at that point. The bra was presented in public at the same time the APEC Summit was taking place in Yokyohama.

The dark blue underwear set was inspired by a tour guide uniform and has a variety of features. Firstly, the bustier has three gold buttons which greet visitors in English, Chinese and Korean when pressed. It also has a transparent plastic pocket to put postcards and removable push-up pads; representation of the country’s tourist attractions, such as the Mount Fuji and the Sensoji Temple’s Kaminarimon Gate in Asakusa.

The bustier comes with a matching miniskirt which comes equipped with the map of Japan on the backside. The map can be unfolded of course!

Talk about good use of technology!

6 No! Shopping Bag Bra

This Eco-friendly shopping bag bra was introduced in November 2006. What’s really cool about this one is that it can actually be transformed into a shopping bag. And if you wonder how on earth is that possible; the bra is equipped with padded cups that convert the bra into a reusable shopping bag when removed. Definitely a bizarre way to carry your groceries around.

The bra itself is made from the Teijin Group’s ECOPET brand of polyester fiber which has been recycled from plastic bottles through the company’s patented EcoCircle recycling system.

This is the only bra in the list that’s available for purchasing. One could get the shopping bag bra in red, blue, green, yellow and pink.

5 The Chopstick Bra

Another environmental-friendly bra from Triumph. What now? A bra with a pocket to carry reusable chopsticks? Deforestation is a major problem in Japan and the disposable chopsticks market is one major cause of that happening. Hence the idea of the reusable chopsticks bra. One could think of better places to carry the chopsticks around though, am I right?

4 Growing Rice Bra

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any weirder. The basic concept behind this bra is, you guessed it… rice farming. Yeah, you can grow your own rice in bra cups! I guess female Farmville fans will find this one appealing! The bra can grow rice anywhere, anytime. Hm, there’s a sentence I thought I’d never say…

3 Solar Powered Bra

How about a bra that gathers solar power and has the ability to power small appliances like a toaster or charge your mobile phone? The Solar Powered Bra was introduced by Triumph in Japan on May 14, 2008 and does just that, among other things… The bra comes with a screen that displays an appropriate message when harnessing energy and get this… it’s equipped with pads, designed to hold your drinks so that you don’t have to use disposable plastic bottles and cans. Environmental awareness above all, right?

2 Nice Cup in Bra

I bed you didn’t know that Japanese women “dig” golfing. Triumph took advantage of that trend and presented the Nice Cup In Bra, a bra featuring a corset garment that serves as a 1.5 METER (!) putting mat when removed. It gets better! When the wearer unfolds the bra and manages to sink a putt, the bra will yell “Nice one!”…

1 Husband Hunting Bra

What could possibly a man want more than his girlfriend wearing a bra with a countdown cloak, anxiously waiting for an engagement ring to be placed into that heart-shaped slot? Sounds more like a nightmare made in Japan, does it not? They named the bra accordingly of course: “Husband Hunting”. The countdown, which is set by the wearer, stops when a ring is placed into the bra and is followed by the wedding march… Who said anything about pressure?